Breaking the Generational Curse of Dieting

It's National Eating Disorder Association (NEDA) week and I think this year I wanted to talk about just HOW MANY of us inherited our eating disorders or disordered eating mindsets because hindsight is 2020

My grandmother has a lot of catchphrases, one of them is “it’s always the mother's fault” said in a very sarcastic tone. In this case, she is absolutely correct. Another one of her catchphrases when I was growing up was, “That *insert food here* is going to go straight to your *insert area of your body you are insecure about because your family talks about it*” 

Example: “That cinnamon roll is going to go straight to your tummy” or “Those chips are going to go straight to your thighs” 

She wouldn’t dare say those things to me now, but the damage is done. I know I am not the only one who grew up with subtle and not-so-subtle comments being made about my food, my body, my health, and anything else.

Maybe it wasn’t completely my mother and my grandmother’s fault. They also inherited the same ideas. But they didn’t take the time to deconstruct them. They did not BREAK the pattern before it was passed down to me.

How do I intend to break this pattern? I have a list of things just off the top of my head that I can offer to you or anyone else.

  • Do not pick yourself apart in front of people (younger, your age, or older)

  • Allow people to eat what they want

  • Do not shame people’s appetite if it is different from yours

  • Encourage movement out of love and joy, not fear of becoming fat

  • Do not express disdain for other people’s bodies

  • Model a balanced diet

  • Explore food fears and prejudices 

  • Stop celebrating weight loss like it’s a lifetime achievement

  • Observe differences without passing judgement

  • BONUS use fat as a description, not an insult

Breaking these types of habits is not easy, especially when they are generational. However, I believe we are all strong enough to do the work. In my own process, I have encountered feelings of guilt, regret, and discomfort. There are things in the past I cannot change, but I can help people as I move forward. If you know better, it is your chance to do better. We are the generation who can break these curses and you are fucking magical.

Lauren Leavell